STEVEN WRIGHT - When The Leaves Blow Away.
More of Steven Wright Quotes:
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
On the other hand, you have different fingers. -- Steven Wright
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.
So I said, "Got any shoes you're not using?" -- Steven Wright
My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted. -- Steven Wright
Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth.
On the back it said, "Wish you were here."
-- Steven Wright
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
-- Steven Wright
I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. -- Steven Wright
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright
"Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes." -- Steven Wright
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo
cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of
the afternoon's appointments. -- Steven Wright
My socks DO match. They're the same thickness. -- Steven Wright
Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the
road an hour. -- Steven Wright
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